Random Wanderings

Since I have had a few people ask me for my potato salad recipe I thought I would post it here. I never measure the ingredients so the amounts are only approximate. Adjust the flavors to your own preference.

1 bag (5 lb) red potatoes (boiled, then cut in cubes without removing peels)

1/2 med onion diced

5-6 celery stalks diced

6-7 hard boiled eggs cut in chunks

Dressing:

1-2 cups mayonnaise

2-3 tablespoons horseradish mustard

1/2 cup home canned zucchini relish or dill relish

1/2 - 1 TBS celery seed

Salt to taste

Mix all together, tastes best after the flavors have time to blend ( a few hours or the next day)

We live in a society that believes the government is at fault for all the social evils of the day. “If we would just fix the government, or get rid of it, then all would be well”, is the predominant thought. “Change” is the catchword of the day.

If in our own selfish interests we succeed in destroying the founding principles of our government and the constitution, we are quickly on our way to destroying our own freedom. Instead of blaming all our problems on the “broken” government, we need to understand the principles behind the constitution that has made it such a successful government and changed the world for the better in many ways.

Our children graduate from school with little understanding of history, government or our civic responsibility. Freedom comes with a price, most of our society has lost that understanding.

I have been reading a book that I think should be required reading for every citizen before they are allowed to vote! It is called, The Genius of America; How the Constitution Saved our Country and Why it can Again by Eric Lane and Michael Oreskes

They summarise the experience in framing the constitution to these 5 lessons:

1. Everyone is selfish. This is not to say that people cannot act well or perform acts of great nobility. But essentially people act to achieve their own self-interest, particularly at the level at which government operates: regulating con­duct and redistributing wealth. People are, however, will­ing to trade one benefit for another and sometimes even sacrifice a narrow interest for a broader one that they feel will ultimately do them more good. The government’s job is to find those areas of common ground. That is where we can build a common good.

2. Government is the steam valve of society. It funnels and relieves the pressures that build from competing interests.

3. Political process is more important than product. Consen­sus around a flawed plan can still produce great progress. (The Constitution itself is the best example.) But a “per­fect plan” without consensus will only produce conflict and deadlock. (The Clinton health care debacle is one ex­ample.) Respect for the system is thus a vital prerequisite for progress. When respect is in such short supply, it is no surprise that progress is, as well.

4. The strength of consensus is directly related to the breadth of representation and the depth of deliberation. A sound­bite society where civic education has vanished has little basis for forging strong consensus.

5. Every interest is a special one. The founders would no doubt be amazed by the scale and power of modern cor­porations and trade unions. But they would have no diffi­culty at all with the idea that everyone has wants and desires and that these drive their views and their allegiances to groups and factions. To them, the only meaningful def­inition of the common good would be the agreement that emerged from an inclusive political and legislative process to resolve competing (special) interests.

Other quotes from the book:

Freedom flows from compromise, checks & balances, representation, & process.

The purpose of government is to produce results better than the desires of the people as individuals.

Americans, like everyone else, are willing to trample the “democracy” of others thus endangering their own.

Issues that destroy self government: mistrust, breakdown of authority, increase of debt, depravity of manners, decline of virtue

Public virtue is the ability to see the larger, common good and sacrifice some of your own interests to achieve it.

Selfishness, failure to stand together, failure to display public virtue, is a threat to liberty.

If global warming is really happening, then why are we wasting our valuable time and resources making and enforcing stupid laws that have no more effect than putting a Band-aid on a cancerous growth?

Are we so arrogant as humans that we believe that we really can have control over everything by putting enough time and resources into it? I don’t believe that even if every person in this world believed in global warming and was motivated enough to put all their effort and intelligence into trying to stop it from happening that we would be successful. Some things can’t be stopped!

If global warming is really taking place then wouldn’t our time and resources be better used in something we do have control over- Adapting to the inevitable changes. Instead of listening to the hype and propaganda that a few rich and powerful people and companies throw our way in order to line their own pockets, we need to fight against those stupid laws that are meant to stop or slow down global warming. They take away and tie up our valuable time and resources.

I believe as a people we are very capable of adapting given enough information and time. If you really believe in global warming then lets start looking for real solutions. Lets put our focus on predicting, strengthening and fortifying, maybe evacuations, and discovering and taking actions on those necessary things we need to do to adapt.

Here is a beginning:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adaptation_to_global_warming

http://www.globalwarming.org

Lets get real people! Instead of making laws that tell us we have to go put our finger in the crack in the dam that make it impossible to use our valuable time and resources in the more effective way of running to warn and evacuate the people and get our self out of danger, lets focus on adapting!

That is the name of a book written by Sheri Dew.

It is one of the most inspiring books of my recent reading. I haven’t finished it yet but it is giving me lots of things to think about.

There is an example she shares in the book about her name badge she was issued when she was in the General Relief Society presidency. Though she carried the badge with her she rarely had to show it. It wasn’t until the day that she was released and therefore the power of the badge became null and void that she discovered how much power the badge really had. She had an early morning speaking assignment and came across a locked door. When she called the security guard to let her in, he told her that all she had to do was hold the badge to the door sensor and it would unlock. All along she had the power with her to unlock the doors to the halls where prophets and apostles walk every day and she didn’t know it until the last day that she had that power.

What she also points out in the book and what I am coming to understand for myself is a similar example of under utilized power available to all baptized members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. At that time, by laying on of hands, and with priesthood power and authority is given a gift! The gift of the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. We are invited to receive that gift. I think many members carry that gift around with them and rarely ever comprehend or begin to utilize the power that is available to them with that gift. In fact I have known good people who are not members of the church that take more advantage of the temporary gifts of the Spirit. Those gifts that are freely given to all people of the world who ask God (or even their own perception of a higher power).

That gift is only given with the commitment of baptism and the requirements and responsibilities that are a part of that commitment. When those requirements are not met the gift gets harder and harder to access. It also takes practice to use and learn how it is manifest in your life. It is not something you just pick up and have full power and control over.

I have a son who writes a blog called God Speaks to Me. It is a total farce and makes a mockery of sacred things. The really tragic thing is that he does have access to God speaking to him. He just chooses at this time to not meet the requirements and not utilize the gift he has been given.

Some of the potential of this gift:

It is like having a mentor walk by your side on a daily basis and prompt you in the choices that will keep you moving in a progressive direction, giving you confidence and helping to accelerate your growth. It can be a voice of warning to protect you from danger. It can accelerate emotional healing and bring comfort in difficult times. It teaches truth and can help you see through the deceptions of others. It can prompt you in what to say to comfort, inspire, or teach others. It can help you retain learning in school and give you guidance in business and other everyday activities. It can teach you what choices to make to heal physically. It can help you overcome addiction. It can give you hope in seemingly hopeless situations. It can teach you of the mysteries of heaven and earth and testify of the existence of God.

It takes practice to be able to tune into the frequency that your individual soul hears. As you tune in and follow the guidance you are able to hear and recognize easier the promptings and guidance.

For me it is a tremendous blessing in my life and one that I am just starting to really understand the power and potential, though it has been available to me for years and I just didn’t understand how to access the power.

Love is NOT a reason to get married!

Many people in our society believe Love is the reason to get married. I dispute that reason. (that is not to say that love isn’t part of a good long term marriage)
I believe that very often Love is confused with Lust (sexual attraction), Romance, Passion, or Intensity of feelings. In long term marriages those kinds of feelings wax and wane like the cycles of the moon. While there are many personal choices that can be made to keep those feelings strong, even in the best of marriages there are times and circumstances where they just aren’t happening. I believe one of the reasons divorce is so prevelent in our society is that people give up too soon on a good marriage because those feelings just aren’t there anymore. If you base marriage on the love represented by those types of feelings it could be very easy to get caught up in a cycle of marriage, divorce, marriage, divorce, etc. The danger of that is never getting to experience the much deeper feelings or security of longer term love. A love that grows from acceptance, commitment, & shared experiences.

Some comments on Sexual Attraction:

Any 2 relatively healthy people (regardless of gender) can have a satisfying sexual experience. What makes that experience the most satisfying for any one person is personal preference. I believe that personal preference is based on experience, with your 1st sexual experiences making the strongest imprint on those preferences. I think if you want to be the most satisfied with your sexual experiences, you should limit it to 1 person only. (that includes not having sex by yourself) I think that is part of the reason why those whose first sexual experiences were painful, abusive,or disrespectful create so much trauma in their lives. There is the constant internal conflict of pain and pleasure all mixed up together.

Because of the intimate nature of sexuality, it is where we feel the most vulnerable and insecure. If your partner has ever had sex with anyone else somewhere inside there are the niggling doubts of how you compare with that other experience. So if you want to feel the most secure with your partners sexual satisfaction, make sure they have never had other sexual experiences.

Some make the choice to willingly give away the chance of having the most satisfying sexual experience in marriage. Mostly they are deceived by what our society promotes. Contrary to popular belief, more variety with more people does not lead to finding more satisfaction. It makes it harder to be satisfied.

Others have that choice taken away from them. Even though past sexual experiences can prevent you from having what you could have had, there is hope! If the choice is made for complete fidelity now & you follow the guidelines for influencing romantic love, then the satisfaction can grow over time.

So if not love, what?

Any 2 people with similar values, respect for each other, & an ability to sacrifice for the good of another can grow in love. If you add commitment, then you can have a recipe for a happy, loving, successful marriage. There is also a warning implied in that 1st sentence. If you neglect your marriage and spend time with others who you respect, there is a good chance you will grow out of love with your spouse and into love with another.

What about soul mates?

I don’t think you should wait to get married until you have found your soul mate. I do believe that for some people they are so perfectly connected or aligned or meant to be together for some other reason that they could be considered soul mates. I don’t think everybody recognises a soul mate before they are married, for some it comes after a time.

I think similar values is the most important consideration for marriage. By similar values, I don’t mean the same religion (though that can be a good place to start looking). I think the majority of people in the world on a core level share the same values. Where we differ is in where one value conflicts with another, which do we choose as a priority. Which values do we feel the most passionate and intense about and which ones are we willing to defer. I think that is different for every individual. The more closely our values line up with another person the more connected we feel.

Sometimes we assume that another person has similar values to our own only to find out later they don’t. That can create tremendous conflict. So how do we recognize similar values in another person? We need to pay close attention to their actions or lack of actions. They could be saying one thing and doing another in direct conflict. Notice silence! Many people will disagree in silence. That can be great in having peaceful relationships but those unsaid disagreements can break up a marriage. Some people don’t know themselves, they may not have had enough experience to really understand what they feel most strong about. Some people pleasers will say whatever they think you want to hear because it is most important for them to be liked by others. Some will say or do (for a time) whatever it takes to get what they want from you.

Our values can also change over time. They can be influenced by our experiences and people we are around. In order to stay connected to a married partner we need to share those experiences at the very least with communication if not in actuality.

It is easy to grow out of love. Any 2 people can find numerous annoyances and disappointments with each other. When you are living in close intimate contact that can be even more prevalent. To continue to grow in love you need to make a conscious choice not to focus on the annoyances and disappointments.

To make a marriage stronger, more synergistic, uplifting, motivating, & bring out the best in each other………. focus on what you love, respect, & admire in your partner and POINT IT OUT often!

To influence the romantic love in your marriage:

• Make the choice to keep yourself clean, reasonably attractive, and as healthy as you are able.
• Notice and point out the physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual things in your partner that you respect and admire.
• Share your intimate feelings.
• Be there for your partner in the tough times.

For those that don’t know me, this is from the voice of experience, I have been married for over 25yrs, our marriage has had it’s ups and downs and survived through numerous things that would have destroyed most marriages. In many ways the marriage is better now than it has ever been before.